I recieved a private message from Cattrina Pendergrass, requesting that I explain to her why I am being a “dickhead” to her.
Several months ago, I wrote to her, in private, asking her to explain why she wrote to me, told me that she cannot believe she ever had any respect for me, called me one of the top 5 fuckheads on her list, and why she then ripped me from her facebook friends list AND blocked me.
I never did get a reply.
I am generally a pretty nice guy, so I am going to reply to her, even though she refused me the courtesy of a reply. However I am going to reply in public so that there is no confusion or misunderstanding.
Cattrina, you are a liar. You and I both know the circumstances of your dishonesty with me. Your lie to me has put me in a position of dishonor. That fact cannot be repaired, to my knowledge you have never even tried to repair it. Even a vain attempt of repair on your part would indicate some redeeming character trait. The fact that you never tried, says something else about you entirely.
In a conversation you and I had subsequent to your dishonesty, you explained to me why you feel it is appropriate and necessary to lie in certain circumstances. I did not, nor do I now make any judgements concerning the validity of your reasons, they seem sufficient for you, and I accept that. Those reasons would not be sufficient for me. People are different, and that I also accept.
Regardless of my understanding and acceptance, the truth remains that you are a liar. In that conversation, you asked me if your dishonesty was a factor in the situation I had asked to talk to you about. My reply to you was “In the context of what I have to consider, your dishonesty to me is as morally significant as if you were to tell a lie to a doorknob.”
Now, I will tell you, I had been asked to consider admitting you as a family member some months earlier, and after some difficult thought, I concluded that admitting you as a storm member would not be best for the family. Some time passed, and again, I was aked to reconsider my decision. That reconsideration was the reason I had asked to speak with you.
Prior to our conversation that day, I learned from overhearing another conversation about your then most recent misadventure, the results, and your handling of the matter. By the time you and I did speak, My reconsideration was done, I had already decided that admitting you, would not be best for the family.
As the elder member of the family I had accepted full responsibility and authority in the matter of admitting memberhip to the storm family. Because of this, I had decided that I had to discount entirely any personal feelings, and focus ONLY on what I thought was best for the family. In that light and in that context your dishonesty with me was not allowed to be a consideration.
However, your lie had caused other consequences that did not relate to me in the slightest. One consequence was that you had deceived your husband and family. Another consequence was that you had betrayed the purity of your sacred circle. In light of your then most recent sexcapade, I found it necessary to consider THOSE matters as significant, and that was the reason I decided to deny your membership.
At the time, you were in pain, and emotional turmoil as a result of being caught with Rick. I could see no valid reason to add to your misery by explaining any of this to you at the time. I really am, generally a nice person. At the time of our little talk, my focus was on confirming what I had overheard, validating the information that I thought I knew and getting out of the conversation with as little drama as possible. All without hurting you, or revealing the nature of my reason for wanting to speak with you in the first place.
In the end of all that I had decided that in spite of your causing the pain, dishonor and trouble that precipitated from your dishonesty with me, that I would continue to ne nice, and accept you in reality, and to love you, regardless of your character flaws.
You are a liar, you deceived your family, and betrayed your sacred circle. Reality bites. I did not cause this, YOU did.
That being said, I will also tell you that I have a fair understanding of why you wrote and called me a fuckhead. I would have appreciated a reply, so that I could have a chance of telling you the truth of the matter that caused you to do what you did, but you would not allow me that consideration, so I will now tell you about what happened. The truth.
Near as I can tell, and this is speculation, but I am willing to bet on the overall accuracy of my understanding, Arrons wife told you that I had posted terrible things about you on my website forums.
You visited my website and could not find what I posted, because that post was on the private and secret storm forums that cannot be seen without a family member account and login.
You then attempted to login, and discovered that you did not have an account. You recalled that I had told you that I had set up an account for you, and it then became obvious that your account had been deleted.
This is where you allowed the perception of another, to cause you to make an assumption concerning your account deletion. I can guarantee you that other persons perception is FALSE!!
I can tell you that because you accepted that false perception, (without question, or testing), the assumption(s) that you made concerning this matter, (again, without questioning or testing them), are FALSE as well.
I will tell you that your account was deleted along with about 60 other accounts several weeks prior to the post I made on my website. I will also tell you that those deletions included other family member accounts I had set up special with rights and priveleges regular members would never have, such as Gary, Mechelle, and Adrian. I find it amusing now to think that you and Adrian both had accounts deleted for the same reason. LOL
I think it is interesting to note that Arron and his wife, among others did NOT have their accounts deleted, Arron still has an account, and so does Scott and Gregg. Arrons wife insisted nastily that I remove her account after she tried to trash my website and failed. Ky still had an account at that time, and did so until she asked me nicely to remove it. I saw an image of some few, sharpening their talons and awaiting eagerly to enjoy a phone call that never came, her name is Ivy, is it not? LOL
The deletion of those sixty some accounts had absolutely NOTHING to do with the family or any conflicts within the family. NONE.
What I posted was in private, meant ONLY for viewing by interested and involved family members, it was not public, until it was distributed publicly by Arrons wife, NOT me.
As a result of this entire mess, caused by others malfeasance and treachery, I retired as family leader with my sense of honor and integrity intact. As a further consequence I have determined that I am no longer interested in associating or being associated with certain persons involved. You are one of those persons.
I don’t trust you.
I don’t like you.
I don’t love you.
I have no interest.
You may now return to hiding in the shadows of those whom you think can protect you.
Or,
You may step spirit naked into the light of the garden.
Your choice.
Regardless, for the now,
good riddance.